Snagged from sapphire_magick because I want to share the love:



Also this week's annoying habbit is that I can't stop fiddling with my earings - number of lost butterfly backs currently lies at five!

This is LEGEN - wait for it, and I hope you're not lactose-intolerant because the second half of this word is - DARY!



Found at:
Garfield minus Garfield

I have entered into a meme, its like the game - as soon as you think about it you instantly loose. I lost the game. *shakes head* sorry, yes, point of this. I don't have enough LJ friends to make me filling out the meme mean anything, consiquently I give you this:
I have wasted the past three days obsessively watching How I Met Your Mother - I still don't know how he met her, but I think Joss Whedon was involved somehow.

8:25 this morning me and Mum were walking to McDonalds (thats not nearly as white trash as that sounds; but where else are you going to find a cup of coffee for £1.19 at that time in the morning?) and we passed a family - who I'm sure I've seen on Shameless (a program I'm yet to be convinced isn't actually a documentary!) - waiting for Burger King to open. A few minutes later they came and sat at the table besides us in McDonalds. I'm assuming that Burger King doesn't open until 9am.
The conversation that went along besides us was so unbelievable I had to write it down.

Father: How many sugars you got there?
Daughter: Eight.
Father: Why the bloody hell do you need that many?
Daughter: To cool my coffee down.
- Silence -
Mother: You need milk for that.
Father: That does explain why we've been getting through so much sugar at home.

I then got up to go to the toilet and the family then began to watch me and mum as we interacted. Like seriously watching us, like we were something out of Animal Planet or something.

And here we have a family of WASPs. Look at them as they argue without raising their voices, instead using heavy amounts of sarcasm to pick off the weaker member. Having conceded defeat, watch now as the weaker WASP scurries away to the merlot.

Okay I was both amused and horrified at this.



That newspaper bit?! That's mine... well its not mine, its his now... but I mean I've been doing that to all the customers as they come in for their papers... most of them neither like nor want it but I do it anyway.

*goes off to write a 'new bit'*

ETA: Sorry, I have no idea where all my tags have gone! I changed my layout and I'm now tagless. I guess this is because I was bitching about somebody else not having any tags. Damn LJ coming back to bite me in the arse.

The following was stolen from vands88 , who stole it from eponymous_rose , who no doubt stole it from somebody else... Ah, the cycle of life memes.

Simply post the first line from your 25 15 (I've deleted so many of my fics, its horrific!) most recent fanfics and try and find a pattern!



If you enjoyed these and want to see more of these on your internet simply call 0800-GIVE-ME-MORE and donate click on circusfreak_88 

(P.S. I  also  have a new found love of coding as all the strike throughs might indicate!!)

This programe sucks. I'm not going to lie. Its not overly funny - nothing is anymore, comedy is going down hill - EXCEPT for this character. She makes the show worth watching. I think its her accent more than her actually being funny... I mean if 'Ello 'Ello has been spoken in the Queen's English it wouldn't have been funny.

Now watch carefully I shall show this only once:


ETA:
'He didn't say "seasonally nicen" did he?'

Tales Of A Bored Shop Assistant - part two
RACHEL: Monica, I’m quitting! I just helped an 81 year old woman put on a thong and she didn’t even buy it! ... I’m telling you I’m quitting! That’s it! I’m talking to my boss right now! ... Yes I am! ... Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Okay bye, call me when you get this message.

I dont know whether to start with the most annoying thing or just skip to the drunk guy?! Decisions, decisions!

I woman came into my store (an Aldays: 'Your local convience store') and presented me with her Co-Op advantage card type thing. I told her that I was very sorry but I couldn't accept that because, despite selling Co-Op products the store is not actually a Co-Op. She responded kindly by spending the next ten minutes ranting and raving at me. 'I only came in here because I thought this was a Co-Op, I want my points etc etc'. I asked her, still very politely, if she would like to see the owner of the store who was just out back. She told me to simply pass on the message and then went back to ranting and raving at me.
I went out back once she had gone, having reluctantly paid for her shopping (even without the points) and told my boss that the woman would like a sign placed out the front of the store explaining that we are not a Co-Op. My boss just looked blankly at me and said 'What you mean like the one that says Aldays?'
Come September I am going to have to wear a Co-Op uniform... I would like to see the looks on customers faces when I tell them we're not a Co-Op then!!

Today is pay day. Thats when the government gives people on benifits their weekly allowance. The boys from the Rectory (a home in the village for adults with learning difficulties) call it 'Pocket money day.' And so they all came in to spend their money. Nuff said.

Five Polish guys, one speaking limitted broken English. Nuff said.

THE DRUNK GUY!. I should retract that, I don't know if he was drunk, he might just have been drugged up to the eyeballs.
Fifteen minutes into my shift this man came into the shop, I thought he was a hobo, he leant down on my counter and asked me if I had any anti septic cream for his toilet roll and selotaped hand. I told him if we did he would have to buy it. He proceeded to show me his hand. It was wound that needed stitches and one that caused me to almost vomit all over him. I'm not squemish, I can watch ER and laugh but seriously that's dude hand made me go feignt. We didn't have an anti septic cream. The chemist was still open next door I told him to go there. He wouldnt leave. He just stayed there, leaning on my counter as I served other customers, intermittently showing me his hand. All the time my hand was to my mouth, I was in the corner saying 'Thats lovely sir, can you put it away now please.'

When he finally left I found his blood on the floor. Good times!!

So I found this on shady76's page. I sit and smile smuggly at my results!

Your result for The 4-Variable Buffy Personality Test...

Faith

73% amorality, 73% passion, 27% spirituality, 45% selflessness

Take The 4-Variable Buffy Personality Test at HelloQuizzy

In this week's spotlight is lol_comics which just goes to show you don't need to be tallented or educated to use the internet! I get that lol_comics are meant to be badly drawn - like LOL Cats are meant to be badly spelt but its just plain ignorant. Let me show you some of the wonders that lol_comics brings us:

( Oh no not another black stereotype! )

Another delight:

( Cause people actually care about your life )

Is it just me or is this just lacking point? I don't know if the 'artist' (and I use the term loosely) is using these 'comics' as a blog of his day to day life or what, but come on! Nobody wants to know that an angry guy barged in on you on the toilet! If you have a shitty day and you hate you job that is not an excuse to write/draw horrible and offencive comics. There is no need. The 'artist' just comes off as an ignorant dick.

Sorry. I know its a rant but its the internet and it was designed for porn and complaining annomously about things that don't actually matter!!

vands88 linked us to a horrifically bad fic. Bless the author and then pless for the love of god shoot her. So just to mock her I give you this:

Like OMG she like totally just like looked at me.

Pairing: 13/Cam
Rating: None... bad language but thats it.
Disclaimer: I own nothing
A/N: This is just for shits and giggles for the love of god please do not take this seriously. But if you do - leave feedback; I love to hear from Valley girls.

I haven't bothered with a cut - cause its just not worth it! Enjoy.

I had been working for House for like a month. I had seen her in the ER and like everytime I did I was just like wow, she is like so fucking hot. I couldn’t like tell anyone cause I mean she’s like straight and I was like I don’t want to be boxed in or anything. I don’t want people thinking like ‘she’s like a dyke’ whenever they see me. I mean you hear the word dyke and thing OMFG she’s an Ellen wannabe (A/N: if you don’t know who Ellen is get the fuck out of my fic!)</p>

So I was like working in the ER cause like the nurses were striking. I think that’s like well out cause like people need the nurses to do their job and it meant that I had to do their job instead of sitting in the diagnosis room being abused by House. I mean like mentally abused – not like sexually you sicko, don’t think that like that. (A/N: if you thought like that get the hell out of my fic – you fucking sicko).

So I was like in the ER doing like the work of a nurse (I dated a nurse once, we played doctor. That was like really hot!) and then she like totally looked at me and I was like OMFG Cameron just looked at me.

 

“Pass me that file.” She said.

 

And I was like “OMG sure. Like whatever, I mean I can pass you that file its not a big deal or nothing. Its not like I’m passing you this file cause I’m like in to you or nothing.”

 

And she was like “OMG stop talking. What are you like some Ellen wannabe?”

 

And I like totally snorted, which was like really lame and I was like totally embarrassed “I don’t even watch the L Word.”

 

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

 

So I was down in the ER again, cause House had got into a bus accident. I mean who even rides the bus, everyone knows you should drive places. Its just cause he’s got a cane, maybe he’s not allowed a drivers licence cause he’s like disabled. Maybe that’s why he rides that motorbike. I mean, its like orange. No one would ride an orange motorbike if they could like drive.

 

And like House called me a lesbian whilst Cameron was watching and like listening and I like totally died. But the she smiled at me and I like think there was chemistry and stuff. She'd be like totally into me if she wasn't like straight and stuff - plus I heard she's like totally fucking that Chase guy but is like in love with House and I mean that would just be like totally weird.

 

Seriously I can’t continue with this its so bad its killing me!

So after the sham that was season six, season eight is Buffy back to form. This post is just one long giant spoiler so its under a cut!

( Whedon may actually be my god! )

So me and V were talking about photos and cameras and well below the cut are a couple of things I took that I'm quite proud of:

( Without the aid of Photoshop! )

I HAVE 145 ICONS, seriously!

Nobody needs 145 icons. I have so many that I just anally organised them into folders (within a massive 'icon' folder naturally). I had to; I had too many, they needed organising, seriously!



And yet, I can still never find the perfect one to express how I feel...

So I put it to you... How many do you have?!

		I will marry Olivia Wilde.
		After a wild honeymoon, We will settle down in New York, New York in our fabulous Shack.
		We will have 5 kid(s) together.
		Our family will zoom around in a Red Audi TT.
		I will spend my days as a Teacher, and live happily ever after.

So I was doodling... was kinda bored and my writing was going no where fast so:

Any questions? Ask them here!!